Done.

Well, I'm done with this. I see no point in keeping this, and I might as well get around to deleting it. So I'd give it about a week before it's gone. If nothing comes up, The Insomniac is no more. It's not like anyone's gonna read this "goodbye message" either, but I guess I can say I gave it a shot. Blogger will definitely be one insomniac short now.

Cure

Wow, it has been quite some time since I've last posted anything up here. Probably because I've been too busy and not staying up late enough to live up to my name on here. Oh well.

Anyways, my topic for today. Angry music :D

I'm pretty sure many people have questioned at some point why I listen to the music I do, it's mainly just my sense of taste, I like rock and metal. Big deal. It hit me the other day that there is absolutely no music like angry music. There is no better way of letting off steam than stuff like this. I've had a bit of a bad week so far, I don't wanna get into details, let's just say another process of things not going my way. Same old shit, different day. Right? Deal. I admit it. Please insert false smiley face here.

SO, rather than exploding on Facebook, I took the best route possible. Angry music. It hit me that I don't have enough of what I used to have of angry music since I quit downloading and purchased all my music. Since I still buy CDs, because I like having the actual CD itself, I went to the Exchange and picked up 3 CDs, which, to my knowledge actually help in their own ways, also considering the order I listened to them made more sense.

1. Snot - Get Some
Part One: Killing off some steam through some genuinely angry/spiteful music.
That whole album is just pure gold, the singer speaks his mind and doesn't care what anyone thinks or says, just fits it to his perspective. If you can relate, you pass part one. If you can't don't even bother with part two.

2. Dope - Life
Part Two: Shit hits the fan, you step to the side of the fan.
The whole CD has a song for everything and it's almost like a retrospective if you can relate to certain things, with the exception of "Die MF Die," that song is just good to listen to when you're pissed off because it's so damn fun! On to part three.

3. Marilyn Manson - Portrait of an American Family
Part Three: Chill.
That album....GOD.

Done.

Point being is I learned a better way to deal with things than most people do. Instead of exploding on Facebook or keeping silent, there is nothing angry music cannot fix. And again, I'm not going to get into detail on what happened, because it doesn't need explaining, nor do I necessarily WANT to explain it. Damn. Thanks for not questioning. Some people find their solace in music, I find it in angry music.

Well, the Insomniac has to rest at some point...so, goodnight, I gotta work. >_<

30

01 - your favorite song
"Maggot Brain" by Funkadelic
A fucking masterpiece in my eyes. 10 minutes and 20 seconds, and it's possibly the best song I've ever heard. It was recorded entirely in one take and the music takes me to a place I can't even possibly describe.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HKJGKu5QIfI

02 - your least favorite song
That fucking stupid Friday song. Just the thought of it makes me want to puke. I don't even WANT to post a link.
 
03 - a song that makes you happy
"December" by Collective Soul.
I have never been in a bad mood and listened to this song. It's just got a great aura.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6exsatE-DUk

04 - a song that makes you sad
"World So Cold" by Mudvayne.
Great song. Sad song. But I love it. Just love the lyrics.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DqLysVUDlq4
 
05 - a song that reminds you of someone
"Addiction" by Dope
For the longest time me and one of my friends used to get eachother's attention by using part of the chorus. I don't think we still do but it brings me back to that.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SEB2oIWcLKc

 
06 - a song that reminds you of somewhere
"Dr. Feelgood" by Motley Crue.
The movie theater, in which the drive turned out to be an EPIC U-TURN-FILLED ROAD TRIP.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHP6U5vQ3mU
 
07 - a song that reminds you of a certain event
"Kindergarten" by Faith No More.
I remember this is the song I first played when I was going to Ashland. It's one of my top 5 favorite songs too.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G0tMHaebt98
 
08 - a song that you know all the words to
"What It's Like" by Everlast
Just an awesome song, so true.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCZ1YteCv5M
 
09 - a song that you can dance to
"Party Hard" by Andrew W.K.
I mean the title even suggests jumping and partying and dancing and shit. The music adds to it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WccfbPQNMbg
 
10 - a song that makes you fall asleep
"Touch, Peel and Stand" by Days of the New.
Not in a BAD way, but it can kinda calm me to sleep.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wg-HZd4Lb2Q 

11 - a song from your favorite band
"Lunchbox" by Marilyn Manson.
Probably one of the first Manson songs I heard. But it's no question. Manson is my favorite fucking artist of all time. NEXT MOTHERFUCKER'S GONNA GET MY METAL!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PRFJoUBP54o

12 - a song from a band you hate 
"A Prophecy" by Asking Alexandria
I. CANT FUCKING STAND THEM. I didnt even go to the video I just copied the link.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_E8x15wkAo
 
13 - a song that is a guilty pleasure
"Trying to Find a Balance" by Atmosphere.
Atmosphere is the only rap act I will listen to, because he's fucking great. All his songs are great, I can't lie about that.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gbEwHJX95QE
 
14 - a song that no one would expect you to love
"The Ballad of Curtis Loew" by Lynyrd Skynyrd.
I'm pretty sure no one would expect this, but I fuckin' love blues. It's got simple musicianship but the lyrics are actually worth listening to because they actually tell you something. And I love this song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NbTpssTGRI

 
15 - a song that describes you
"Something for the Suffering" by Gunfire 76.
Not word for word but in general, I need something for the suffering for all the stupid shit. I got it. Not giving a fuck :P "I find myself talking to the wall." I often feel ignored. At least the wall hears me.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h9YNadq6l34
 
16 - a song that you used to love but now hate
"Dust N Bones" by Guns N Roses
Not necessarily hate, but it's just lost its flavor.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuSN3Cf6d9Q 

17 - a song that you hear often on the radio
What the fuck is a radio?
 
18 - a song that you wish you heard on the radio
"Summertime Suicide" by Murderdolls
I'd imagine I would hear it. W13 even said it's the closest thing they have to a nice song on their album. I'd imagine it'd be a hit instantly. lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnre03uMkfo
 
19 - a song from your favorite album
"Stress Related" by Ventana
American Survival Guide Vol. 1 - The Anti-Everything Album. FUCKING GREAT.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vYoDM9azDbA
 
20 - a song that you listen to when you’re angry
"People = Shit" by Slipknot.
At least with Slipknot I can let the anger out. This song pushes the anger out entirely.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LFJIBtqunHY

21 - a song that you listen to when you’re happy
"All My Best Friends are Metalheads" by Less Than Jake.
Upbeat song. Awesome song. First time I heard it was when I was watching the Digimon movie. YEAH? SO WHAT! SHUT UP!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_F-ipYpd53I
 
22 - a song that you listen to when you’re sad
"Lamb of God" by Marilyn Manson
So sad, but at the same time, so fucking great.
"Nothing's gonna change the world."
So sad. So true.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c1H8pwehAkY

23 - a song that you want to play at your wedding
"Friends and Family" by Trik Turner.
Cuz if I do get married, I'd expect my friends and family to be there, and I can't imagine where I'd be without them. Don't judge. Don't bitch.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HDDmMX3UdwQ
 
24 - a song that you want to play at your funeral
"Maggot Brain" by Funkadelic.
See #1. I fucking love that song.
 
25 - a song that makes you laugh 
"Fuck the Shit" by Sons of Butcher.
I have never heard such great lyrics lmao
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OyxNgnQ9m30
 
26 - a song that you can play on an instrument
"War Pigs" by Black Sabbath.
It was on my mind at the moment, I can play PLENTY others on the guitar. But damn, do I love Sabbath.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pZCyOWLrRTE
 
27 - a song that you wish you could play
"Torn Between Scylla and Charybdis" by Trivium.
No explanation needed. Just listen to the song, lol.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4_nJ2vQg3EM
 
28 - a song that makes you feel guilty
"Bye Bye Missy" by King Diamond.
Since "Them" is a concept album, it kind of puts me IN the picture, like I can see what's going on. This song makes me think I'm kinda there in a sense, and why the hell didn't I do anything? But it's a good song.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EVHbkLoFCMY
 
29 - a song from your childhood
"Have a Cigar" by Pink Floyd.
Ridin' the gravy train. Thank you Dad for getting me into classic rock.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V5mZKZtIy2k
 
30 - your favorite song at this time last year
"43" by Mushroomhead.
Back when I was REALLY into Mushroomhead. Still into em, just not that much.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sj470nbiWfI

Procedure

Let's just keep it simple here. When I don't give a fuck about certain things, the results are neither good or bad, but they're in between. That process usually results in two steps. Apparently I interrupted my own process, sadly, and turned it into a four step process. (This is not about love or hate or how some people are really stupid.)

This is simply a theory I've devised based on experience.

What I Did:

Step One: Not Giving a Fuck About Certain Things
The process of not giving a fuck about most daily things, inducing more pleasant results in some areas where you DON'T give a fuck and more time to focus on others. This process is usually the one that lasts the longest, seeing as it is a life basis. Some may call me wrong, but, hey, I can make my own decision.

Step Two: Really Good Thing
In the event of a really good thing, a slight revelation happens that maybe there's a change in the wind, or maybe there's some new luck to come around, and whatever happens may not be so bad.

Step Three: Really Shitty Thing
The really shitty thing is an instant counteraction to the really good thing, and usually comes within an hour or a day, not giving the really good thing enough time to be savored or even exist. Side effects will come, but it is enough to cause a demise of previously said good event.

Step Four: Returning to Step One
Returning to step one usually is a result of further venting or handling the situation by itself. Based on the rate of which this happens, time to recover could start off at a few days, and eventually get down to a few hours.

What I Should've Done:

Where the hell did I go wrong? I allowed step two to occur. The original should've been this:

Step One: Same as above

Step Two: Neutrality
Sadly I failed to heed my own advice at this part. Based off of my theory and the way it works, if I let Neutrality occur, the step two listed above, as well as three and four, wouldn't even occur. It would be: step one, neutrality, repeat. In neutrality, I wouldn't care about something either way, being neither pessimistic or optimistic. I'd be stuck in the middle, just passing it off. But for some God-awful reason, I allowed that switch to take place. Why I did that eludes me.

What is my point here? If I had done what I should've done, I would allow no room for disappointment nor elation. But since I took the opposite route, what happened? I did allow room for elation, therefore, allowing room for disappointment. As I've learned, they cancel each other out. If you set the bar high and get low results, you're going to be disappointed. If you set the bar low and get high results, you're happy. But if you don't set the damn bar at all, there is no effect.

Idiocracy

Define perfection?

A dictionary, the supposed source of genius defines it as the state or quality of being or becoming perfect. My definition? I don't claim to be all-knowing or genius, but it's quite a simple description had it been based on reality. Yes, it may be more sarcastic or more cynical, but hey, you can't disagree:

Perfection: a hallucinogenic disease that people develop based off of their own vain, unintelligent ideas of themselves.

I'll admit I'm not perfect, and I am absolutely nowhere near it, but at least I have the balls to do it. I'll also admit reality sucks, because if you know it does, you're not gonna lie and try to make a cartoon fantasy out of it. Perfection is a hallucination and none other. It alters the mind into another state of being that everything is just going to exist as you predict. Everything's just going to run through smoothly and you can just step on everyone else as you go along, right? RIGHT?

FUCK THAT SHIT.

There are times where not giving a fuck is necessary. But acting like everything is perfect is different. One is tired of shit, the other doesn't know of such shit. Wake up.

Neutrality

3:35. The insomniac's dream, possibly.

Optimism. Pessimism. And then at the edge of both, you have your judgmental bastards who take it into their hands to label you like it's in their power. I got a better one: NEUTRAL. Everyone's so familiar with the "glass is half empty, glass is half full" saying. I got a better idea. Who the hell said I had a glass to begin with? Rather than being optimistic or pessimistic, neutrality is bliss. And it's not ignorance, don't compare based on cliche. It's awesome. There's only a certain point in time where a human being will stop giving a fuck about certain things. And you know what? It works. It might appear to be the easy way out for some people, but any other neutral person out there just knows the rest are just jealous they haven't figured out how to do it yet.

So get to work! I even included an instructional.

Defectoplasm

WARNING: Long.

Apart from Defectoplasm, "Flux," the title I have given to the second CD, is going to take quite a twist. If you're familiar with clips from the first Defectoplasm album, what is most notable? Short songs. Hell, the longest song on there is 8:58, but only because it's two parts. And yes, it definitely had a punk rock feel borrowing from heavy metal. Defectoplasm I [which I'm just gonna call it to reduce confusion] is majorly a rendition of past writings, almost in a nostalgic manner to resurrect the lifeless corpse that once was CYN. And hey, I got no writing limit. Might as well post the song meanings so no idiot gets some idea that I'm planning on going to Hell because of my music style.

Note: "Intro" is unlisted because it has the disclaimer: "Warning, if any of the following lyrics are offensive to you, quit fucking complaining." No need to repeat something that awesome. But it's better off keeping that there considering some jackass might take offense to this. Really? COME ON! Continue at your own risk.

• "Bled:" Procrastination. There shouldn't be much description needed but I'm gonna throw it out there anyway. Yes, I'm a victim of said subject, so I'm admitting it, that doesn't make me a damn hypocrite. It's clearly saying by doing so you're just gonna end up hanging by a thread, and the more you do it, "it never ends so well."
• "Get Out" I honestly doubt this one needs clarification because its title basically screams its own meaning, so you can probably figure it out because I'm sure everyone has had someone in their life who couldn't fuck off to save their life. [Insert smiley]
• "Backflip:" To think this one has a point is idiotic. It doesn't. It's a bunch of oxymorons, aside from "alternating medication."
• "Intervention:" Another one obvious by title. People change and sometimes they don't go back. Well what the hell are you gonna do about it?
• "Drain You Out:" This almost bears repeating to reference "Get Out" and a similar subject, yet this one is about the process of removing someone from memory entirely.
• "Away:" I need a break from all the dumb shit. Who doesn't?
• "Calamity:" Dreams are good. We all love dreams. We can pursue them. We can set realistic goals to make them happen. However, shit happens. Imagination can be misleading.
• "Execution:" I'm sure some trolling loser is going to make a statement saying this one is about politics and how they're so corrupt. Yeah, like there aren't a MILLION of those already. Jesus. This one's probably one of the few that I have written not based on fact. It's only making a statement. It's saying that everyone will have their downfall, whether they're at their lowest point or highest point, some shit's gonna happen.
• "I Don't (Fucking) Know:" Clearly I don't. You don't. We don't. Nobody does. The future is unpredictable but people continue to act like con artists who give a cold reading for $100 just to say "You're going to leave the room." Lying may be used to make people feel better, but when cliche occurs, it's just gotta stop in its tracks or it's just going to stay longer. The future could be what you make of it, or it couldn't. Who knows? I know I don't. I don't fucking know.
• "Inner-Space:" This is the other one off the album not based solely on fact. It's a science fiction sort of song. Just listen to the lyrics. To make it REALLY simple: Post-apocalypse living would just straight up fucking SUCK.

And that covers "Defectoplasm I." Onto "Flux." "Flux" is my second planned album, in which I have three songs already recorded, six are remaining. Hate to pull off a spoiler here but, here's the tracks as well as that sweet lookin' album cover:

1. Haunting
2. My Insomnia
3. Sick Design
4. Wired
5. Break Point
6. Nothing
7. Inside My Head
8. Pins and Needles
9. In the Hands of the Martyr

Note: This album is going to be quite a pain to get through, possibly the longest time I've ever had to take in the process of writing an album. I mean, alone, with what I have recorded as of this moment, I have a solid 20-21 minutes done. And that's only 3 songs. OH MY GOD! And, if you're wondering what happened to "Valentine's Day," the song that kept the spirit of the holiday in an incredibly sarcastic manner, it wouldn't fit the bill for Flux. It's too short, and it's a different style. You'll see it again in the future...maybe updated?

As the first album was, some of these songs were based off earlier writings. Verse two of "Haunting" was taken from a horror-themed song I had written entitled "Deformed Imagery." "Inside My Head" was originally "Lost in my Mind." Right? Big fucking change! The point is, compared to the punk rock/heavy metal style of Defectoplasm I, Flux is going to be much different. As I have already recorded Haunting and My Insomnia, based off the musical style and such, Flux is going to be much darker. Not quite heavier, just darker. It's gotta get darker before it gets heavier. Now I just said the tracklist so I'm not going to go through an entire meaning list like album 1, however, I will tell you this. From what I've recorded, Flux is kicking Defectoplasm I's ASS! The best part? Track 9. "In the Hands of the Martyr." I know what you're thinking. What's so special about an almost 12 minute instrumental improvised and played by soul, not for speed? Back that up and read it again and you'll figure it out. If I were to stop Defectoplasm now, [don't worry I won't] "In the Hands of the Martyr" would very likely be the swan song, the one legendary song. It's a fucking beautiful masterpiece, and I'm not just saying that because I did it, it's just that amazing. So, if you read this, look forward to more Defectoplasm in the future, and be fucking excited for Flux.